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Sometimes I wonder whether the things I do every day will actually get me what I want out of life.

Writer's block

I hate it.  I wish it could just all flow out.  The story is there, in my head.  But getting the details out on paper?  Or, rather, out on the word processor?  That's the hard part.

Also.... this new post editor?  Hm.  Gonna take some time to get used to this.

Downward spiral

And the hits just keep on coming.  FML.
maybe i'm just broken
I'm depressed as fuck.  I have been for about a month. A little longer, I suppose.  I'm trying everything I can to try to distract myself.  I've started going out more.  Found a new coffee shop.  Spent an hour at the library today editing my "novel" in progress.  It's a shit novel, but whatever.  It's a distraction.

I'm a bit intoxicated.  Cape Cods.  I bought more cranberry juice today. I have enough vodka for tonight.  Might need to buy more tomorrow.  I took tomorrow off because this was supposed to be a relaxing birthday weekend -- ha, so much for that shit.
Life.

I need a cookie

I could really go for a warm chocolate chip cookie right now.

Spell your name in fictional characters

P | Peter Pan
R | Ron Weasley
E | Ender Wiggin
C | Cartman
I | Icarus
O | Obi Wan Kenobi
U | Umbridge
S | Simba

Archived Innings

Formerly known as The Baseball Attic, one of the coolest baseball blogs recently experienced a name change.  Check out Archived Innings here: https://archivedinnings.com/

Some of my wacky favorites from A to Z

Because why not?


Animal- lately, cats

Book- Ender's Game

Color- blue

Date- My birthday

Energy drink- Monster

Football Team- Green Bay Packers

Gum- no preference

Holiday- Halloween

Ice Cream- Cookies n Cream

Juice- Apple

Kind of exercise- hm...  obstacle course race

Lunchtime meal- cheeseburger

Movie- Shawshank Redemption

Number- nine

One-liner- it happens

Pet- my kitty cat

Quote- TR's Man in the Arena speech

Reason to smile- I have a kickass life

Song- Make Me Bad, by KoRn

T.V show- South Park

Unique Person- my friends, they're all pretty unique

Video Game- The Sims

Wrestler- I don't watch wrestling

X-Men- hm... I'll go with Xavier

Your vacation place- My bed!

Zodiac sign- Virgo

Tags:

February summer

I am completely unable to focus.  The weather is gorgeous as hell and I can't stand being stuck in my office right now.

Plus, I'm irritated.  Beth has ditched me and Rockfest this year because of a guy.  When I pointed out that this must mean they are crazy serious, I got no response.  So essentially, I got ditched for a guy who may not even be in the picture this time next year.  Doesn't that make me feel good?

I'm eating too much, which also sucks.  Maybe I should go for a walk.  Might make me feel better and will burn a few calories.

Worn out

Dear World,

I have no interest in being helpful today.  Kindly fuck off.

Sincerely,
Sick of your emails

Chugging along

I finished re-reading and sent in my copyediting suggestions for the Razorgirl novels.  I've been going through the .epub files to look at formatting, and I'm almost done doing that too.  I just have one more to look through, then I'll send in those observations as well.  My hope is to be done tonight.

Traveling over the weekend to be with Grandma for her 80th birthday.  Karen is going to check on the house and cat while I'm gone.  Should be fun times.  I've mapped out a 4-mile and a 3-mile route in the area of our hotel.  I don't know how much time I'll have to run, but I at least have those.

TR quote

Let us rather run the risk of wearing out than rusting out. ~Theodore Roosevelt

I love this quote.  And it's not just because TR is one of my heroes.  Actually, TR is one of my heroes because he lived by this mantra, and I agree with it wholeheartedly.

I've been watching Ken Burns's documentary on the Roosevelts: Theodore, Franklin, and Eleanor.  It's fascinating.  FDR is portrayed as a bit of a dick, which may be entirely accurate, but I cannot say for certain.  I haven't read nearly as much about FDR as I have about Theodore, though I will say that the stuff about TR falls in line with everything else I've read or watched about him.

TR was a regular firestorm.  I pride myself on how productive I manage to be on a day-to-day basis, but really, what I do is nothing compared to what Theodore Roosevelt did every day of his life.

Tags:

Patronus

According to Pottermore.com, my patronus is a grass snake.  I was hoping there would be additional information on the site discussing what this is supposed to mean about me, but there doesn't seem to be that feature at this time.  Perhaps in the future this will be something that they develop.

It does, certainly, fit in with my Hogwarts house, which is Slytherin.  Fascinating that J.K. Rowling's world seems to view me as fitting in with the snakes.  It's not something I truly considered for myself before -- well, maybe that's not entirely true.  I did used to have a recurring dream about a snake when I was a kid, but never really anything beyond that.  There's so much negative stigma surrounding the snake, at least in this culture.  However, there is a mythology that Alexander the Great was conceived as a result of his mother's intercourse with a snake.  They're often considered to be symbols of fertility, and in some cultures, even of healing.  Then, of course, they're also associated with the fall of the Garden of Eden, with the underworld, and so on.

A lot of people are terrified of snakes.  My friend Dereck once described me as having a don't-fuck-with-me demeanor about me, so maybe this is related to that?  Possibly.  Either way, this is fascinating.  I may have to do some reading up on snakes.

First day of fall

Finally!  Yes, I hate the cold and, much of the time, find that I acclimate to heat much better than I do to the hell-frozen-over temperatures of winter.  But summers are starting to get unbearable.  The Republicans need to get their heads out of their asses and acknowledge that global warming really is a thing.

And a look back

I'm about a hundred pages into Ian's novel, Trace.  More copyediting for Razorgirl.  Ian's a good writer.  I'll have to tell Christine that he ought to write another novel -- she'll pass the message along.  People love to have their egos stroked.

Much of the copyedit suggestions I find seem to be punctuation-related.  I think it must be natural to me to understand punctuation, grammar, etc., which seems like a strange talent to have.  I mean, I got a 35 on the English portion of the ACT, but who cares?  I can write, and I can do it grammatically correct.  Few people seem to care about that.

Honestly, in this world it seems like such a superfluous skill.  A 35 on the math portion of the test would've been more impressive.  It seems all the acknowledged brilliance in the world is math- or science-related.  I'm not as naturally talented in either area, but I have the work ethic that could've made it work.  I should've majored in engineering or something.

No, that would be selling out.  I did enjoy my majors.  It's hard, though, to look back and just wonder what if...?

U of Chicago's letter

All college students seriously need to read this.  The culture of entitlement and the desire to be shielded from all things that might be uncomfortable is permeating even the university setting to a point that it's becoming unbearable.  Which is unfortunate.  The point behind a university education is to push yourself beyond your comfort zone, to expand, to learn, to grow.  We're losing that, and it really worries me.